I'll find you - Stucky story
by Radiant Rhino
Summary: What if the Winter Soldier wasn't just used for killing? Can Steve get through to Bucky? (well yes obviously but that's not the point) Includes a bit of pre-serum Steve too. (Smut)
1. Chapter 1

**Before the war**

* * *

Steve lay on his back on the worn sofa, doodling absentmindedly in his latest sketchbook.

The draft from the window caused him to shiver and snuggle further down into the old blankets. Looking up from his rather wonky drawing of a cat, he glanced at the ticking clock on the wall.

"Buck should be home soon." he thought aloud.

Looking at him, you wouldn't have thought Steve Rogers was a 24 year old. With his skinny limbs and prominent rib cage, he only looked to be a boy and upon seeing him- if indeed they noticed him at all- many a stranger glanced around for his mother.

His mother had, in fact, had passed away several months earlier leaving Steve broken and alone.

Except for Bucky of course.

Bucky had not hesitated to take Steve in under his wing and had insisted that Steve move into his modest home. He was always there for Steve. Always.

'Til the end of the line.

Steve smiled gently as he tried to fix the cat's ears.

He had no clue what he'd do without Bucky... Without Bucky, he'd be alone. Without Bucky... no. There was no without Bucky.

He frowned a little as the cat's ear went wonky once again.

It was in this state that Bucky found him when he walked confidently into the room moments later. At first, there was no response from the skinny blond.

"That's it? No fireworks?" said Bucky opening his arms and pouting slightly.

"mm." came the reply as Steve tried and failed to get an uninterested expression to hide his giant grin as he concentrated harder on a whisker.

Bucky smirked at his antics and smoothly moved around the back of the sofa in the center of the open plan room.

"Whatcha drawin'?" he whipped the book away earning an undignified squawk from Steve as he tumbled from his nest and jumped to his feet to chase after Bucky who backed away, holding the book high and flipping through the pages.

"Oh that cat again eh? Ooh, and what's this? Another of me! Ooh yeah, look at that jaw, mm! Might keep this one, eh Stevie? How about that hmm?"

"Buck! Give it back! I nearly had that bit right!"

"Haha not a chance shorty! C'mon, jump for it!"

"BUCKY!" Steve laughed breathlessly as he desperately reached for his sketchbook that Bucky now waved at arms length above him.

Laughing Bucky brought the book down to his chest. Steve quickly grasped its edges and held it for good measure.

It was only now the two realised how close they were standing. Almost chest to chest (forgiving the height difference) and hands intertwined around the book.

Neither was willing to break to moment (although they both knew they should) so Steve leaned into Bucky and Bucky did not stop him.

The pair stayed like that for a good while both knowing they should be debating the situation but instead just enjoying the closeness of each other.

Then Bucky's stomach grumbled.

"Someone's hungry..." Steve mumbled into Bucky's shirt, turning his head to nose against his jaw.

Bucky laughed a rumble of a laugh that seemed to run through Steve's small frame. The two separated and Bucky, handing back the sketchbook, headed to the cupboards in search of something to munch.

Steve tossed the book onto the abandoned blankets and followed his 'friend'.

* * *

Just a little pre-serum/pre-war Stucky before we time jump to the winter soldier :)


	2. Chapter 2

The night before the train

Steve had the serum. Bucky and the gang were captured. Steve has single-handedly saved them all and they've made a kickass squad.

This is the late night/early morning before the train mission (feels) and they've stopped somewhere in enemy territory in a (convenient) sheltered forest.

For Bucky, what was making him most uneasy wasn't the fact they were deep behind enemy lines; or that he had been captured by Hydra; or even the rock that was uncomfortably digging into his ass.

No, what was really troubling Sargent Barnes of the 107th was Steve.

Well, what Steve had become to be precise.

He had always been there for Steve. Through his achievements, failures and ever constant illnesses, Bucky had stood with him. He'd always thought Steve's spirit was too strong for his body... but now his body was strong too.

And Bucky fleetingly thought that it suited him very well indeed.

He brooded on these thoughts whilst staring into the flames of the small fire he'd lit for himself, a little way from the others.

The crunch of footsteps on the frosty ground behind him had him on alert. But he needn't have worried himself for even with his new appearance, Bucky knew Steve's footsteps like no other.

Carefully lowering himself to the ground beside Bucky, Steve flashed him a small smile. Bucky smirked back, a next to natural reflex.

The two sat in silence for a short while.

Then Bucky cleared his throat quietly and spoke.

"So how come the great Captain America took time out of his busy schedule of fame and dancing dames to rescue some measly troops like us?"

Steve chuckled and Bucky was relieved to hear it sounded like it always had, only just a little deeper. Bucky would not acknowledge the little stirring that slight rumble caused in him.

"Well you've spent years looking after me, figured it was my turn." Steve smiled again.

Bucky couldn't help it. He stared.

In that moment Steve's eyes looked so deep and dark and ... _earnest._ The fire's embers flickered and illuminated his golden blond hair. He looked healthy and real and happy.

And Steve stared too.

Bucky was tired but at his physical best even though his hair was a little messy. His grey eyes seemed to flicker with flames of their own. Something moved deep within them and a peculiar expression came over them.

Steve knew what it was. He'd received it before, and given it, but neither of them had ever confronted it. That's just how it was.

But now it was just the two of them.

They were alone in their own little bubble, like they were suddenly back at the apartment again, like it was the two of them against the world.

Then Bucky leaned in.

And Steve did not stop him.

Their lips met gently. It felt like years had been leading to this (and in all honesty it had). Steve shuffled closer and reached across to cup Bucky's cheek and tangle his cold fingers into his hair.

Bucky began to kiss with more force and Steve willingly followed. Bucky gently pushed on Steve's chest, signalling that he should lie back. And he did.

There was no undoing it now. Not that he wanted to, thought Bucky as he lay half on top of Steve. His Steve.

As he became more passionate he felt a slight hesitation from Steve. Carefully he pulled back to look down on Steve, lying, breathing heavily, on the frozen forest floor.

He was about to say something when Steve, who thought with alarm that he may never get this chance again, hooked one hand over the back of Bucky's neck and snaked the other about his waist and pulled him down again.

Bucky was more than happy to comply.

The kiss again started slowly, but quickly escalated. Even with his lack of experience, Steve knew what to do and ventured to lick out at Bucky's mouth.

Bucky was quite taken by surprise at this new development but quickly returned the favour, gently pushing his way into Steve's mouth and savouring the feel of Steve's warm, wet tongue against his.

Steve moaned just a little and the sound sent a tingle right through Bucky.

Steve moaned again, somehow managing to mumble Bucky's name through the intense kiss.

Bucky was growing hard and was beginning to feel the familiar strong urges. Only this time directly centred around the man beneath him.

He straddled Steve's form, breaking their contact for just a moment. Steve sat up a little, desperate to get back to the fireworks Bucky was setting off inside him.

As their lips reconnected, a deep lustful rumble rose up from Bucky's chest.

"Mmmm Stevie..."

Steve let out a breathless whimper and thanked the stars he was no longer asthmatic.

Bucky began to move, circling his hips, searching for relieving friction.

Steve was losing himself to the intensifying feelings he was experiencing. Bucky too, was close to letting go of all reason.

And they really might've had it not been for a particularly loud laugh from one of the men at the main camp area. The laughter was swiftly quelled by a chorus of shushes.

It was then that Steve remembered where he was and under what circumstances and, now alive with angst, he pulled back and sat up straight.

Bucky said nothing but remained straddled over Steve's legs.

"Buck, Buck we can't do this here. It's dangerous. I-I-It's not right for here. We can't do this here..."

He fidgeted and looked around feeling a heavy disappointment settling over him.

With all fight gone from him, Bucky moved and sat beside Steve once more.

"If not now, when? What if this is the only time? Because, Steve, I spent at least a month in Hydra's grasp, just hoping that I'd one day be able to see you again...and now look at us..."

There was a moments silence.

"People say it wrong, Buck... _This_."

Bucky's face rearranged into a look of grim defeat.

"But I don't think so." Steve finished more certainly and looked back at Bucky. "And what just happened here? I would do it again." He turned to face Bucky better.

Bucky was stunned and turned to Steve too.

"I want this. I want this again. And I promise you we will finish this, Stevie." he said lowly.

Steve smirked a little "I'm counting on it, Sargent."

Bucky lightly punched his shoulder.

The air felt light for both of them, like a weight that had been hanging over them for years was finally free.

"Agh. We should probably start moving soon. C'mon"

They stood to return to the main camp and stamped out the last embers, scattering the remains about as they went.

Steve stopped Bucky as he headed to go.

"You promise?"

"I promise."

It was those same blue eyes Bucky wildly searched for the next morning as he hung to the blasted railing of Dr Zola's train.

Those same blue eyes, so full of fear, that was the last thing he saw before the great noise of ripping, snapping metal.

A flash of blond, that spangly outfit, those eyes...

then a great whooshing, a terrified howl forced up from his chest

and helplessness

and pain

and dark.

ooh the feels

they almost got there but not quite

next up probably some winter soldier ;)


End file.
